Scout vs Bibi (Team Fortress 2 vs Brawl Stars)
Description Two fighters take their stance as they swing for the ultimate prize in this match of life and death. Interlude (Cue Wiz and Boomstick) Wiz:In combat there are many tactics that play a crucial role in victory. Whether it be sniping away at a distance or running and gunning, it all matters in the long run. Boomstick:Friggin’ runners think they’re so much better than you just because you can’t hit em, well I’ll show them once I get my hands on em. Wiz:Speaking of runners, we’ve got two of gamings best hit and run professionals like Scout, the blitzing and obnoxious mercenary of Team Fortress 2. Boomstick:And Bibi, the retro stylish batter of Brawl Stars. He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick. Wiz:And its our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle? Scout (Cue Archimedes) Wiz:The story of the Mann family is one full of many absurdities, from the eagle scourge that would save the genius Grey Mann, to the stupidity of Blutarch and Redmond Mann that would later cause the ire/death of their father Zepheniah. Truly, the Mann family were anything but normal. Boomstick:And all that was just the beginning. With the will of Zepheniah made from his own flesh (Eww), he left the gravel pits that Blu and Red had made him foolishly buy to the "brain defective" brothers to own equally. But if dealing with my ex-wife has taught me anything is that sharing is definitely not a strong suit for humanity as Blu and Red soon hired mercenaries to fight a war that would put the world wars to shame for just how ridiculous it was. Wiz:This war brought in many talents from all around the world from the outback of Australia, the beauty of France, and even the south side of Boston, Massachusetts. Among those that rose up to the challenge was a young man named Jeremy, AKA, The Scout. Scout:Here's a schematic for ya, my ass! (Cue Faster than a speeding bullet) Boomstick: (sarcastically) Welp, sounds like a charming fellow. Wiz:Yeah he does, anyways The Scout in short is a loudmouthed, obnoxious, cocky bastard with a knack for getting into trouble just as well as he does getting out of it. Yet despite being all that, he proved that he was a surprisingly capable fighter on the field once he learned one valuable lesson:If you can't be stronger than them, be faster. Boomstick:And Scout took this lesson to heart as he developed his speed and agility to the point of being at peak for a human and even developed the double-jump technique, which I guess came from too many soda cans. Wiz:Scout didn't just learn how to run, he also mastered close quarters combat (Most likely stick fighting) and the use of firearms, combine that with his borderline superhuman speed and you have the perfect hit and run artist. Scout: Grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and brother, I hurt people. Wiz:Scout joined Team Fortress and began his fight in the war between the nigh immortal Blu and Red (thanks to life extension machines) and soon put his abilities and skills to the test, along with some intriguing weaponry. (Cue playing with danger) Boomstick:And here I go with the intern's notes and my expertise with guns.Scout's stock weapons include a gun physics defying shotgun known as the scattergun which is a lever action shotgun with two barrels that fires six shots. On top of that he also carries a standard pistol as a sidearm, a baseball bat for close quarters hand to hand action, and way more. If he needs more power for his shots, he whips out the trusty Force-a-nature which fires two automatic shots and can send enemies and Scout flying from the kickback. He also carries the shortstop which fires more pellets for a better chance at hitting the enemy. The soda popper can grant Scout the ability to jump five more times in the air for quick getaways when enough damage is done. The baby face blaster can increase Scout's natural running speed after shooting someone. The back scatter does a ton of damage when hitting someone in the back. The Winger pistol trades in clip size for better jumping height. The Pretty boy's pocket pistol heals Scout for every hit landed with the pistol. The flying guillotine causes bleeding on people which affects the healing factor of characters. Bonk atomic punch is a tasty eleven pound of sweet sugary goodness that makes Scout virtually untouchable to even lightning. The crit-a-cola increases Scout's strength. Mad milk increases the damage given by Scout by 60%, making it perfect against tough opponents. The atomizer gives Scout a third jump. The wrap assassin causes bleeding when hit by the ornament. And finally the Sandman decreases the speed of others when hit by the ball of the bat. Goddamn this is a long list of weapons, luckily it was about guns and weapons, otherwise I would have been ready for the second longest nap of my life. Wiz:And that's not all. With a magical magazine, Scout somehow has access to many magical spells that range from simple fireballs to cloaking to outright meteor storms and an army of skeletons. Despite being a man of science I do genuinely enjoy the mysteries of magic, although it does seem that the creators of TF2 really think that magic words are just a combination of Latin and English. Boomstick:Good grief this gives me memories. Wiz:What do you mean? Boomstick:Some idiot magician ripped me off with a magazine that would supposedly give me superpowers but it turned out that it was just a highly decorated nutrition magazine, damn it cost me twelve-hundred bucks! Wiz:Yeah, well hey at least he did me a favor, definitely made you eat veggies while doing flips, you even had an existential crisis on the floor because you couldn't do a handstand while eating cabbage, it was hilarious. Boomstick:Shut up! YOU'RE AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS! (Boomstick tries to eat cabbage while doing a handstand but instead falls on his back and chokes on cabbage) Boomstick: (Chokes) Goodbye cruel world. (Cue Team Fortress 2 main theme) Wiz:Now all these weapons would be useless without an exceptional wielder and Scout proved to be above and beyond that requirement. He's strong enough to outmuscle the heavy in close quarters combat, a man who could overpower a giant Siberian brown bear like its nothing. His strength also goes to his weapons as he can easily break a bear's neck with one hit and can destroy machines and even a tank with his weapons. In all honesty, despite being considered as just a simple speedster, his physique is basically superhuman all-around the charts. He's tough enough top be the butt monkey of the Team Fortress crew, taking abuse everyday, was durable enough to survive a tug-o-war between Saxton hale and Heavy while being the rope and could tank 4 rockets landing on him (1 on the side and 3 at point blank range) which assuming its from an RPG-7 and has a rocket weighing 5.7 pounds, it would equal over 7.2 tons of TNT, enough to destroy a building, and Scout was caught dead center, sent flying, and crashing into a building's window, which only ended up with him receiving a broken nose and loose teeth, implying that he can survive even more than that. And of course true to his training, he is insanely quick as he can quick step automatic fire (Putting his agility at massively faster than Mach 1) and can even keep up with a train which goes at speeds of at least 40 mph and with Bonk atomic punch, he can even out pace bullets and dodge lightning which goes at speeds of up to one third the speed of light. When you put it simply, if Scout had even a hint of discipline, he would probably be the most dangerous man on Earth. His cocky attitude has gotten him into many situations and can make him not bring his A-game to the table at times. On top of that he does not have any long range weaponry, preferring medium to short range weaponry over something like a rifle. Boomstick: (Coughs out a piece of cabbage). But despite that, The Scout has proven that just because he seems scrawny, it doesn't mean that he can't put up a good fight, whether its agains't other mercs, deadly robots, or even a friggin' Yeti, you can always count on Scout to see it through and be a badass the whole way. (Scout eats a Sandvich on an unconscious Heavy) Bibi (Cue Brawl Stars Mecha Menu) Wiz:The strange land of Brawl Stars is one full of whacky and charming characters who can either help you in a time of need or try to end your life over simple grudges, all without a hint of explanation. Boomstick:Huh, I'm getting a hint of Deja vu. Wiz:Brawl Stars has many locations ranging from a dry desert to a sunny beach, but for people who want a touch of the retro days of civilization, there is a location where the neon lights shine brightly and the chaos is just as ever present in the streets, this is Retropolis. Boomstick:Looks familiar, wait a minute, this looks almost identical to the plans of Boomstickia! Bastards at Supercell, wait till I get my lamp lawyer on your asses! Wiz:You're lawyer is a goddamn lamp?. Boomstick:Yup and his name is Lampert Lawrence. Wiz:Oh my fu**ing God, anyways while Retropolis may look like a safe haven from all the chaos of the world especially with its flashiness, it is far from immune to the disasters of brawling since deep within the city of Retropolis, a gang of outlaws spread fear and terror in the hearts of other brawlers. Whether its from the strong enforcer Bull, the fast and tactical knife thrower Crow, or if you want both at the same time, the steadfast and brash slugger of the team, AKA... Bibi. Bibi:Tough as nails, hard as a rock! Boomstick:(Whistles) Look at that cool cat. Wiz:Funnily enough, that's an actual quote she says. Boomstick:Really? Perhaps we're kindred spirits. Wiz:Do you even know what that means? Boomstick:Yeah, it means that we have somethin' in common that attracts us, right? Wiz:Eh Close enough, anyways following her passion for things retro, leather jackets, and baseball, she decided to join her crew in the quest to further enforce their status as dangerous felons and in the end, they succeeded as being worthy brawlers against anyone who stood in their way, all while running a successful diner with Bull and Crow. However for that to have happened, she had to pull her own weight in the fray and sure enough, she not only pulled, but she carried, all with the help of her trusty skills and her close friend:Mr. Bat. (Cue Brawl Stars battle theme 1) Boomstick:And here we go again. Her trusty companion is a RETRO-fitted baseball bat that puts even Lucille to shame (Suck it Negan). This bat is long, strong, ridiculously durable, and just stylish, perfect for giving anyone a brutal beatdown. If that's not enough, it also has a charging mechanism in it that causes the bat to spin rapidly and once Bibi is ready, she unleashes the full power of Mr. Bat and swings with a crunching blow that's so powerful that it can stop anyone in a split second and send them flying into yesterday! She also carries a few power cubes that can increase her strength and durability once absorbed, though these are more found on the environment than in her pocket. On top of that, should she need to give people an even earlier grave, she whips out an energy drink that is totally not Monster and once she drinks it, her size, strength, and speed skyrocket temporarily, all with a sweet purple aura.And she's also quite creative with how she uses gum as should she need some range, she can make a giant bubble of gum that she smacks towards her enemies, perfect for catching them without breaking a sweat. Wiz:With all that power , you would think she would be sloppy in her approach, but in actuality, she is actually quite a competent fighter and seems to be well trained in stick fighting, though her approach seems to emphasize more on heavy hits and overwhelming the enemy, sacrificing finesse for sheer brutality, kind of like a slugger in boxing. On top of that she also has star powers that can help her out in the fight. Her Homerun star power can increase her speed by 15% when her bat is charged, making her fast enough to dodge gunfire and her Batting stance star power gives her a shield that reduces damage by 30%, making her much more durable than before. (Cue Retropolis battle theme 1) Boomstick:And when fighting men with shotguns, warriors with magical spells, and living cactus people, you would think that a chic with a baseball bat would be about as useless as a pretty boy with shit guns, but in actuality she exceeds way better than a certain pretty boy that I totally let get killed every time I play Brawl Stars. Wiz: Wait you purposefully let Colt get butchered in Brawl Stars? Boomstick:What can I say, he's annoying and he cries like a baby when he dies, its fun! Wiz:Eh fair point, and also another fair point with Bibi's usefulness in brawling despite her basic yet retro equipment. She's tough enough to keep up with El Primo, a man who can land and hit with enough force to equal a meteor crash. assuming that this meteor is composed of mere space rock and weighs about 600 pounds and going at atmospheric reentry velocity, that would equal over 765,000 pounds of force or about 382.9 tons of force. She even survived Dynamike's mega blast which we concluded in Colt vs McCree was powerful enough to equal 60 megatons of TNT. And she's not just a bullet sponge either, she's also got superhuman strength which comes in handy a lot of the times. One example of this is when she was strong enough to knock back the giant boss robot several meters away. Assuming this robot is composed of titanium judging by its durability and has a volume of 2100 cubic feet if it has a length of 15 ft, a width of 7 ft, and a height of 20 ft, we found that this robot must weigh over 22 tons, and with her strongest hit, she actually managed to push it about 10 meters away, literally giving her the strength of eleven peak men. Boomstick:Holy shit that's impressive, almost as impressive as her speed. She's fast enough to dodge bullets from a colt cobra and can even catch up to them for a short time, putting her running speed well over Mach 2. Whelp I do like a fast and capable woman. Wiz:Really when you put it simply Bibi can really go toe to toe with most adversaries and fellow brawlers, however she does have certain weaknesses that hold her back. for starters, besides gum, she really doesn't have any means of holding down against long range brawlers other than just tanking and dodging, on top of that she does tend to struggle against opponents that can match her speed and she does tend to sometimes be rather overconfident in her abilities, which could be her downfall sooner rather than later. Boomstick:But in the end I think its safe to say that Bibi has truly earned her place as a strong and capable brawler worthy of survival and glory, all thanks to her and Mr. Bat. Bibi:Konichiwhack! Preparation Wiz:Alright the combatants are set, and we've run the data through all possibilities. Boomstick: Its time for a Death Battle!!! Death Battle (Cue Sex Bomb-Tom Jones) In a flashy city full of neon lights and a pothole spitting out gems, a van can be seen driving through the streets running over gems and flying over a ramp with grace. In the van, the Scout can be seen driving and listening to Sex Bomb by Tom Jones on his headphones while steering with one hand and drinking crit-a-cola with the other one. Scout finishes the drink, throws it out the window, and checks his to-do list. The only thing on the to-do list is:Take down the Retropolis gang. Scout:I don't get why Ms. Pauling gives me the easy stuff, ah whatever, at least I get to do it on my own terms. Scout suddenly stops as he sees the line of traffic ahead of him to Bull's diner. Scout groans. Scout:Ah damn it, this is gonna be so effin' boring. The screen fades in and out to a 2 hours later title card where Scout is seen finally making it to Bull's diner. The scene shows Scout parking his car and pulling out his equipment from the van. He takes out his Scattergun, the stock pistol, and his trusty baseball bat. Scout takes a look at the bar and smiles smugly. Scout:They really gotta suck ass if their lair is this piece of crap of a diner. (Cue One step forward- School of thought) Scout walks towards the diner while the scene cuts to Bibi sitting on a stool while looking at a menu with Mr. Bat in her other hand. She looks at the menu absent-mindedly while Bull comes over from the kitchen with a pencil and notepad. Bull:Ready to order Bibi? Bibi smirks as she looks up at Bull. Bibi:I'll have a burger with an energy drink, pronto please. Bull simply nods, writes on his notepad, and walks towards the kitchen. As Bibi kicks back on the stool, Scout enters the place and observes the scene. Bibi turns around to see Scout holding up a Scattergun, Bibi tightens her grip on Mr.Bat while Bull arrives with Bibi’s energy drink. Bibi: Ya lookin’ for something, scrawny? Bibi mocks Scout but he simply smirks. Scout: Huh, guess you ain’t as dumb as you look, yeah I am looking for something, just some animals and a washed up little league player that need to go back to the trash bin they came from. Scout retorts with his quip while Bibi simply takes the energy drink and stuffs it with only a hint of annoyance on her face. Bibi: Sorry lamebrain, but we ain’t goin’ nowhere, so I suggest you head back while you still have can. Scout merely rolls his eyes and starts to aim his gun at Bibi. Scout: Guess I’ll start with you toots. Bibi gets up from her stool and throws a wad of gum at the juke box’s button, changing the track. (Cue School of Thought- It comes and goes) Bibi pops her neck side to side and twirls Mr.Bat, activating its spinning mechanism. Bibi: Mr. Bat says hi. Without even a moment to respond, Bibi lunges at Scout and while Scout shoots, Bibi sidesteps the buckshot and lands a clean hit on Scout’s ribs, sending him flying out of the diner. Scout bounces on the pavement and crashes onto the van, dazed but still conscious. Scout: Damn, who is this chic? As Scout starts to get up and recover, the dust starts to show Bibi’s silhouette which jumps out of the dust as Bibi prepares to crush Scout. Scout rolls out of the way in time as Bibi smashes the van. Bibi turns around and spots Scout who pulls the lever from the Scattergun and shoots Bibi, this time landing his shot and knocking Bibi onto a lamppost. Bibi quickly recovers but is shot again, causing a grunt of pain from Bibi that only slows her down from her recovery as the brawling batter gets up and vaults over the next shot. Scout: Woah. Bibi closes the distance and prepares another hefty strike. Bibi: Chew on this! Scout quickly steps back, just barely avoiding getting hit but not before losing his Scattergun to the side from the hit. Bibi prepares a downward strike but Scout quickly draws his bat from his bag and blocks the oncoming strike, surprising Bibi. Scout breaks the clash by grabbing his pistol with his free hand and shooting two shots into Bibi’s stomach, knocking her back and giving Scout the perfect opportunity to smack Bibi in face with his bat. Scout: What’s the matter, all talk and no skill? Bibi’s face lights up with anger. Bibi: Oh I’ll show you skill. Bibi charges up the mechanism in Mr. Bat again and this time activates her shield, Scout opens fire with four more shots but Bibi’s shield reduces the impact enough for her to power through them and swing at Scout. Scout ducks under the swing but Bibi quickly retaliates by tagging the mercenary with a swift knee to the nose, making a heavy cracking noise. Scout holds his nose in pain but Bibi punches Scout in the face, grabs him by the shirt and throws him onto the windshield of the now smashed van. Bibi: Next time, talk less and do more jerkwad! (Cue Kill em all-Max Anarchy) As Bibi starts to walk away, The van starts to glow and then smoke comes out briefly, later revealing Scout with a spell book magazine. Scout: Ah hell yeah, time to light up this popsicle stand, magic style! Bibi looks back and sees Scout still alive, she flourishes Mr.Bat and prepares for the oncoming assault. Scout chants the spell for fireball and shoots it at Bibi. Bibi jumps, narrowly avoiding the fireball but leaving herself wide open for a ball of bats spell which Scout uses to swarm Bibi with blood sucking bats that injure Bibi, and block her eyesight. Bibi: Get off me ya flying rats! Scout uses this opportunity to pull out his Force-A-Nature and shoot Bibi with a near point blank shot that knocks the both of them back. Bibi lands on the pavement hard with a heavy smack while Scout lands with grace. Bibi gets up albeit with some difficulty while Scout pulls out his trusty shortstop, shooting pellets that Bibi just narrowly avoids. Bibi pulls out her energy drink and two power cubes. Bibi: Alright you cocky punk, you have a death wish that bad, then I’ll just have to help you reach hell as fast as possible! Bibi absorbs the power cubes and drinks the energy drink. Her Body begins to glow a purple aura and some of her wounds begin to heal. Scout is momentarily in surprise but regains his composure in order to fire another shot from the shortstop, Bibi however is too fast and slides under the pellets and begins to close the distance. Scout fires again and again to not much success due to Bibi’s shield activating right on time to reduce the impacts as she prepares to swing. In a quick motion, Scout somersaults over the swing, lands behind Bibi and pulls out his atomizer. As Scout retaliates with his own swing, Bibi reacts just quick enough to parry the hit with Mr.Bat and front kick Scout in the stomach, knocking him back. Scout blocks another swing and attempts to strike Bibi with a quick jab but his attempted strike is swiftly avoided and instead gives Bibi the opportunity to knock Scout off balance with another heavy swing. Scout tries his best to get back on balance but he isn’t fast enough as Bibi charges up another swing and lands a sickening crunch on Scout’s ribs, sending him flying and eventually ending with a crash into a construction site right in front of the diner. Category:Death Battles with Music Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:'Gun Fights' Themed Death Battles Category:Bat Wielders Category:Combatants with super speed Category:'Video Games' themed Death Battles Category:Manchitas777